Dave: Tears
by Kindre Turnany
Summary: Dave's thoughts when he sees Kurt at the mall some time after Kurt's return from being kidnapped. This is in the universe of By Any Other Name but does not fit into the story proper. AU after Duets.


This is a bonus chapter for By Any Other Name. It runs parallel to events in chapter 47, but really all you need to know is that after Duets in season 2, Kurt was kidnapped by a rapist and has since come home but has yet to return to school.

**Warnings: language, mention of rape, homophobia, gratuitous love of Hot Dog On a Stick**

A/N: I made an OC for this because I wanted another football player, but this isn't even the story proper, so it's like I made him but he still doesn't exist. ;_; So, uh, just know he exists. I created him on the spot and gave him the first name that came to mind (Devon Spade), but I actually really like him (and his name) anyway.

**Dave: Dumbass Tears**

Dave waited with the other guys in front of the Hot Dog On a Stick while the blond chick with the dimples worked on his order. When someone tried to tell Dave that Hot Dog On a Stick was for kids, he'd usually just wink at one of the girls, dressed up in that ridiculous outfit like it was some sort of awkward fetish gear. Honestly, he just liked the food. The day he found out they had cheese on a stick with pepper jack, Dave could have died happy. He just had to remind himself not to think about how... phallic the food here was.

"Duuude," Azimio playfully punched Dave's shoulder. "Either ask for her number or talk to _us_. The staring thing is old."

The right guard laughed nervously, glad that they mistook his distraction for a silly crush. It wasn't that at all. He glanced back over his shoulder for what felt like the fiftieth time. He was still there: Kurt Hummel. He was hanging out with the black chick from glee whose name was probably some kind of car. Dave had kind of imagined Kurt never left the house. That he holed up in his basement with the lights out reliving all the terrible things that had happened to him.

The news didn't like to say outright what Kurt had been through, but everyone knew. Nobody wanted to talk about Kurt, really, but Dave still heard the whispers about who had taken him and what had happened. He heard when they said Kurt was asking for it by being so goddamn gay. They were probably right.

"Two hot dogs on a stick and three cheese on a stick!" The girl called out. She smiled at him, darting her eyes from his hands to his eyes in what was probably meant to be an eyelash flutter.

Dave grinned, maybe a little too wide. "Thanks." He took his food and found a table nearby where the others stood. Azimio and Devon Spade sat while the others stood around the table talking and laughing.

"She's totally into you, man. You gotta tap that." Z probably meant to be encouraging. It was cool that he thought Dave was interested. Dave wanted him to think that. Hell, Dave wanted to be interested. She was cute and could probably give him an almost unlimited supply of hot dogs, cheese, and lemonade. He just... thinking about 'tapping that' did nothing for him.

He glanced over at her and looked straight down at his table when she looked up, trying desperately to blush. He'd played shy around girls for years. It came almost naturally now. Some of the guys thought it was 'cute' in a let's pretend to set Dave up with our little sisters now kind of way. A few of them thought he was dumb but shrugged it off as leaving more girls for them.

"Seriously, Karofsky, if you don't ask for her number, I will," Spade nudged Dave's arm like that would make him move.

Dave grunted and took too large a bite of cheese on a stick. It was too hot, but fuck was it delicious.

"That's it then." Devon nearly knocked his chair down he stood up so fast. He marched over to the counter and leaned against it, probably trying to look suave. The girl said something and looked over at Dave and the rest of the team, but she was too far away now for him to hear her. Spade frowned, his lips barely moving when he spoke. She shrugged, saying something else. Then Devon grinned, leaned forward to whisper something, and practically skipped back to the table.

"Spade, why do you look so happy? You clearly didn't get her number." Azimio sounded as confused as everyone else looked.

"I'm not her type." he shrugged. "I've a guess who is though." He gave Dave an exaggerated wink. "Probably best you wait a little while before asking her out. She knows we're friends."

"Is that what they call it?" Dave rolled his eyes. He and Devon Spade weren't friends. They barely knew each other. And most of what he knew about Spade was that the guy was annoying as all hell and never anything but painfully energetic.

Z laughed, and the others followed suit, including Devon. While they were distracted, Dave chanced another glance at Kurt. The singer looked up, straight at Dave. The jock jerked like he'd been burned and focused on his food again.

"Karofsky, dude, you'll never have a girlfriend if you're too scared to ask 'em out." Spade shoved half an eggroll from his plate of crappy Chinese food into his mouth. "Unless you're into mega-forward girls, I guess," he added with his mouth still full.

Dave kept his head down and didn't respond. He hated talking about girls. It wasn't hard or anything to appreciate when they're good-looking sort of... abstractly. He could look at Hot Dog On a Stick girl and recognize that she was cute, if a bit baby-faced for hot. The problem was that it was all in his head. It was _supposed_ to be in his body. Raging hormones and all that.

He glanced back at Kurt again to find the boy had gone. Thank God.

"I know some guys at OSU who think they're connoisseurs when it comes to ladies, and they aren't half as picky as Dave," Azimio said. He had already finished his pizza but made a grab for some of Spade's orange chicken.

Strando snickered, leaning his weight against the table next to Dave's. "Dude, you're on the football team. I don't get why you're too scared to even ask a girl out."

"Yeah, they swoon over lettermans." Azimio grinned, stroking the sleeve of his jacket.

The guys got into a debate about what girls liked most about jocks, and Dave took the chance to wolf down the rest of his food. Even though the boy had already left, Dave glanced over to where Kurt had been sitting earlier and thought about deserving to be raped by a man just for being gay. Part of him said that was fucking stupid. Plenty of women liked men without ever deserving to be forced into sex, so why would it be different for a guy who likes men? But he remembered the whispers saying Kurt probably liked it.

Had he liked it? Could he like it? Dave nearly choked on a swallow of lemonade. Kurt was a prissy bitch. He had to have hated it. If it was no big deal to him, he'd have come back to school. But he was gay, didn't that make a difference? Make him less of a man? Why couldn't he just change, just like women instead because, honestly, who would _choose_ to be gay in a world like this one? Dave hunched over the table and wished fervently that he could like girls. Even just one girl. One would be enough.

Once Spade finished his orange chicken—the dude ate slow as shit; he was even worse than Grandpa Murray—the guys stood and began shuffling away from the food court. Strando elbowed Dave, pointing over to where Kurt and his glee friend stood in line at the Orange Julius.

"Dude, creeper faggot alert." He chuckled and probably expected Dave to do the same.

Instead, Dave scowled. Looking at Kurt made Dave think of all the things he 'deserved,' all the things they _both_ deserved. He felt ready to puke and practically ran from the smaller teen. He muttered something about not wanting to catch anything that all the guys laughed at to excuse how fast he got the hell out of there. He didn't want to talk to _them_ about Kurt. He didn't want to talk to anyone about fucking anything. Dave stalked all the way to his truck and left, ignoring Z and Spade's attempts to calm him down. He didn't want to be calm. He wanted to be straight. And he wanted to be as far away from anyone he knew as possible when he stopped being able to hold back the dumbass tears pressing at the backs of his eyes.

**~.x.~**

This is the first time I've written from Dave's point of view! :D

Please review?


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